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Located: 1700 S. Goyer Rd., Kokomo, IN 46902  l  Tel: 765-452-8463  l  Mail: tbckokomo@usa.net

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Temple Baptist Church Kokomo, IN, Kokomo, IN churches

From the Pastor's Desk

Dr. Mike Holloway &

Dr. Jim Willoughby

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How To Deal With A Bully by Dr. Mike Holloway

In order to know how to deal with a bully, it is first necessary to understand why certain people choose to do so. The primary reason is because they are seeking power.

One of the biggest bullies in the Bible was king Saul, and by looking at his behavior, it is far easier to understand a bully as well as how to deal with them. Saul was head and shoulders taller than anyone else in Israel (1 Sam. 9:2), and while that did not affect him earlier in life, it allowed him to intimidate his followers in later years. Why? His additional height and strength became a spiritual liability when he no longer had the character to control his inflated ego.

This type of bullying is seen frequently in the form of road rage. In nearly every instance, an aggressive (angry) driver is driving a high- performance vehicle such as an SUV, a truck or a car with higher horsepower. Because a vehicle is bigger or more powerful, it provides a bully with the ability to intimidate the other driver.

Based in part on how David chose to deal with Saul's many attempts at bullying, what are some of the most effective ways to treating a bully?

1 - Display an attitude of confidence. Bullies are looking for weakness and fear to prey upon. David's confidence around Saul was based on his knowledge that God was pleased with him and had chosen him to one day replace Saul.

2 - Choose to walk away. While Navy SEAL's are trained in a variety of weapons, their preferred method of engaging the enemy is not to engage the enemy. They rely on stealth to remain undetected and to avoid undue conflict. When Saul was in a foul mood, David would absent himself from the dinner table in the palace.

3 - Toughen up emotionally and try to ignore words or actions meant to provoke. David was constantly giving Saul the benefit of the doubt and multiple second chances.

4 - Inform leadership. When David barely escaped from Saul's assassins, he made his way to Samuel who managed to protect David while in his presence.

5 - Physical action should be a last resort. In relation to Saul, David refused to take his life and chose rather to allow God to deal with him.

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